August 18, 2004

Skillz

In addition to my ability to write somewhat journalistic-like material, which accounts for my daily livlihood and ensures monthly house payments, I have the following as-of-yet useless abilities:

-- I can accurately mimic such voices as Kermit the Frog, Jimmy Stewart (both young and Campbell's soup old guy), Apu from the Simpsons (or any random Indian guy, for that matter), Mayor Quimby from the Simpsons and a wide variety of other voices that are, I believe, uniquely mine.

-- I can write limericks, very quickly. I have no idea where this skill developed. I've just always had the ability. I'm willing to bet, if there were video available of my birth, you'd hear me crying in limerick form.

-- I excel at lewd poetry, in general. Ask me to write a serious poem about the trials and tribulations of life, and I wouldn't have a chance. Ask me to write an evocative piece of rhyming poetry about a fresh pile of dog poop on the sidewalk, and I could write volumes.

-- I can be an irritating and loud prick, but you all probably already know that.

Posted by Ryan at August 18, 2004 10:19 AM
Comments

We didn't KNOW it, Ryan. We ASSUMED it.

;)

Posted by: Jim at August 18, 2004 11:08 AM

Quit sending my spam, Rhodes! I keep getting spam from Ryan without a subject line.

I'm very happy with the size of my penis and don't need to buy cheap cigarettes through the intarne.t.

Posted by: Johnny Huh? at August 18, 2004 12:42 PM

Quit sending mE spam. Geez, I suck this morning.

Posted by: Johnny Huh? at August 18, 2004 12:44 PM

Then why are you holding out on us? Where is the lewd poetry, the limerics? Now I feel all cheated.

Posted by: Beth at August 18, 2004 06:09 PM

"Ask me to write an evocative piece of rhyming poetry about a fresh pile of dog poop on the sidewalk...."

Well... alright. Hey Ryan, would you please write an evocative piece of rhyming poetry about a fresh pile of dog poop on the sidewalk for us?

Oh for the love of God, what have I just done???

Posted by: Strider at August 20, 2004 12:23 PM
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