May 25, 2002

Tall People Are Tall Another

Tall People Are Tall
Another note about the wedding. This wedding was attended by Joel Przybilla of the Milwaukee Bucks basketball team. Now, I stand about 6' 2", and I have a friend who stands 6' 6", but this Joel guy stands at 7' 1", which is the tallest human being I've ever seen within a three foot distance, let alone shake hands with. Not being a particular fan of B-ball, I had no idea who this man was, but as I entered the church in my tuxedo, looking fairly cool if I do say so myself (which I just did), I was pretty sure it didn't matter how good I looked: every girl, guy, child, pastor, insect, and spirit of God was looking at this Joel guy because he was just a towering presence. He was just soooooo tall. In movies and television, when they want to represent a tall creature, they show a lot of close-ups with the camera low to the subject pointing up, and they have the "tall" subject, who is actually 4' 11", move slowly. Here's the deal: the taller a person is, the slower they appear to move. Take this Joel guy, for example; he moved toward us, and it seemed like his actions were turtle slow, but he was upon us before we finished extending our hands for a handshake, making up a 20 foot distance in three steps.

US: "Hey, Joel, *step* have a *step* good night. *step*

*Hand shake with a human paw that could actually shelter you during a thunderstorm*

JOEL: "Good meeting you. *step* I gotta go. *step* My girlfriend is. . . *step*

*Unable to hear hear Joel because he has stepped three more times and is half a state away.*

At least he didn't hear the fire alarm.

Posted by Ryan at May 25, 2002 11:36 PM
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