Let's Get Readyyyyyy to Rumble!
Mel and I had our first big fight this weekend, and like most fights, it was over something just incredibly stupid.
Friday night brought an April snowstorm, complete with huge, wet, sloppy flakes, slick roads, and treacherous conditions. And Mel thought she would drive to Rochester in the maelstrom. This did not set well with the worried boyfriend. I told her to quit being so stupid, and to stop putting herself and the other stupid motorists at risk. But, she pressed on. After an hour and a half of battling the elements, she had traversed only about 20 miles.
"Stop being so stubborn and stupid," I told her over her cell phone. "This is so fucking pointless!"
"But, I just want to see you, and I don't want to turn around after being on the road for an hour-and-a-half," she explained.
"Listen, I can't stop you from doing this, but I will tell you right now that I'll be blindingly pissed if you drive down her tonight," I said, and I meant it.
Two hours later, sick with worry, and after two unanswered calls (she didn't hear it ringing), she called and told me she made it to Rochester. She wanted to come over right away. But, I was so blindingly pissed off, I didn't want to see her, so I told her to got to her mom's, or her dad's, or anywhere, but don't dare darken my doorstep. She protested, apparently unable to understand why I was so mad.
I didn't want to see her. I couldn't imagine seeing her. She had so totally thrown common sense and safety to the side that I just sat in dark rage. Rage because I had to worry over her for such a pointless reason. I wanted to be away from her. Far away from her. I didn't want even the possibility of seeing her.
I waited until the snow let up, and I drove around to assess road conditions. Then, I decided to drive down to my hometown, putting distance between myself and Mel. I called her and told her that I was going, but I got her voice mail and decided that would have to suffice. In other words, in my pissed off state, I went and did exactly the same thing that pissed me off so bad in the first place; I drove in shitty road conditions. Actually, the roads were pretty decent by the time I took off, but the hypocrisy of my decision still stings me.
Mel was not pleased, and I suppose that was my intention all along. She came down to Rochester to be with me, so I turned the tables and drove away from her. One of those stupid relationship games that I hate playing but get sucked into regardless.
"You're so fucking selfish," she yelled at me via phone. "I can't believe you did this! Thanks for ruining MY weekend!"
The stark irony of her calling me selfish while at the same time ruining HER weekend just served to piss me off all over again. This was simply a battle of wills. Her selfishness versus mine. Her stubborness versus my own. And when it comes to selfishness and stubborness, Mel and I are just too equally matched.
Come Saturday, I was fine. I was ready to put the whole thing behind me. Mel was not. She yowled and howled at me, crying occasionally, occasionally calling me foul names. Thus, Ryan's anger level started rising again, and I didn't want to see her again. I mean, who wants to see someone when you're both just incredibly pissed at one another? Gee, that's quality time. I told her I was staying in Harmony, and she could stay in Rochester, and she started crying and asked why I didn't want to see her, and I told her she already knew the answer to that.
See? Just totally stupid. We were both wrong. We were both totally wrong. But we both weren't going to admit it. And so the game played on.
Come Sunday, I decided it was time to conduct damage control. We had by that time forgiven each other via phone, but she was still hurt. So, I drove from Harmony to the cities, surprising her (even though I left a message saying I was coming up. She never checks her messages). What followed was a lot of make-up sex, which is always just really great sex. During make-up sex, it's like you just try harder, or enjoy it more, or whatever. It's just really good sex.
We didn't mention the fight. We just both knew we were wrong and that it was just best to move past the whole dumb deal.
It was just so fucking stupid.
Posted by Ryan at April 7, 2003 10:38 AM
Stumble It!
