I drink a lot of Diet Pepsi. As in, I drink a disturbing amount of Diet Pepsi. I drink so much Diet Pepsi, I’m pretty sure I sweat Diet Pepsi.
I really, REALLY started to appreciate just how much Diet Pepsi I drink when I arrived for work in our store last week, and there was a voicemail waiting on our phone left by the people from the store across the street. The message informed me they had received a new shipment of Diet Pepsi.
I should note here: the store across the street from our store is a flower shop.
To reiterate: I drink so much Diet Pepsi, the FLOWER SHOP across the street left a message at our store informing me they had a new shipment of Diet Pepsi. I apparently represent enough of their business to warrant a courtesy call. Sure, they deal primarily with seeds, flowers, shrubs and topiaries, but I’m the Diet Pepsi guy who REALLY pays the bills.
While I genuinely appreciated the courtesy call, I had to inform the flower shop that I wouldn’t be requiring their Diet Pepsi services for awhile because. . . I had just recently won a year’s supply worth of Diet Pepsi. That’s because, I drink so much Diet Pepsi, I entered a bunch of Diet Pepsi codes over the course of about two months, and one of the prizes I won was a year’s supply worth of Diet Pepsi.
You’ll notice I wrote “ONE of the prizes I won.” I wrote that specifically because I won SEVERAL different prizes over the course of about two months. In fact, a quick tally of the prizes I won includes:
- A year’s supply worth of Diet Pepsi: WHICH, technically, was 48 coupons, each good for a free 12-pack of cans of the Pepsi product of my choice. To most mortals, that may sound like a lot, but for me that’s woefully disappointing and will only actually last me a couple months, at most.
- A huge Pepsi beach towel: I don’t even live anywhere near a beach but, hey, FREE TOWEL!
- A Pepsi tee-shirt: Because you can never have too many tee-shirts.
- A Pepsi baseball cap: Because my son might enjoy wearing it some day.
- A Pepsi tote bag: I don’t even tote things, but whatever.
- ANOTHER Pepsi tote bag: Because if you’re not going to tote anything, you might as well do it twice as much.
- A Pepsi serving tray custom designed by some guy named Vern Yip: This could very well end up being the most useless thing I’ve ever won.
- A Pepsi Frisbee target game: Just in time for winter!
Keeping in mind, the preceding list represents just a single contest. Over the last six years, I’ve also won 46 Major League Baseball caps—I won so many of those caps, I sent one out to practically everyone I know and don’t know—a Flip video camera, $260 worth of $20 checks from Pepsi, and a Microsoft Zune (making me about the only person in the universe who actually owns a Zune).
Come to think of it, about the only thing I haven’t yet won from Pepsi is a car, and that’s probably just because I didn’t drink QUITE enough Diet Pepsi.
But, hey, if you’re a Pepsi executive reading this right now, I’ll totally accept a car from you. I’m not picky.
Obviously.
Posted by Ryan at August 24, 2013 02:06 PM | TrackBack
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