Sandwich of Ruin!

Schizophrenic Color Schemes

My girlfriend is an interior design student, which means, more and more, that I'm deferring all decisions regarding interior design and decorating to her. Curtains? Up to her. Wall art? Up to her. Cabriole legs? I have no idea what that even means so, naturally, that's up to her.

Up until recently, deferring to the decorative leanings of my girlfriend was pretty much a harmless exercise. It made her happy to be able to pick out bedding patterns, so I let her pick out such mundane items because, honestly, I don't care what kind of bedding I sleep on, so long as it provides some semblance of warmth.

Now, however, I own a home, a home which hasn't been updated since sometime around 1958, so it requires a lot of cosmetic updates, not the least of which includes new paint in every single room.

Seeing as how I don't have an eye for color, by which I mean I think everything should be white or, even better, chrome, I naturally deferred all color decision-making to my interior design student girlfriend.

The problem with my interior design student girlfriend is that she changes her mind so suddenly, and violently, and with such regularity, I secretly wonder sometimes if she is, in fact, mildly schizophrenic.

After she obsessed for roughly the same amount of time as the Paleozoic Era over which colors would look best in each room, we were off to Sherwin-Williams to buy paint.

On the way to the store, I made a point of asking whether she was certain the colors she selected were the ones she truly thought were the best. She assured me they were the greatest colors ever in the history of the world. Therefore, after shelling out over $300 for paint, I felt confident that I had just bought many gallons of the greatest colors ever in the history of the world.

As more and more paint was applied to the various walls of my new house, however, doubts started surfacing in the mind of my schizophrenic girlfriend. Her once unshakable confidence over her color choices started wavering considerably.

First, she was worried about the colors she picked out for the trim. Then, she was worried about the somewhat purple color emanating from what will become my office. Then, she came to the conclusion that the living room looked like an avocado. These were not the doubts I wanted to hear after spending over $300 on the greatest colors ever in the history of the world and dedicating roughly eight million hours applying the paint to my various walls.

My girlfriend now is assuring me that everything will be just fine if I just change the color of the trim. She says simply changing that single aspect will make everything right with the world and turn my house into the most super-awesome house in the world. Foolishly, perhaps, I'm thinking about taking her advice yet again.

After all, if I had my way, my entire house would be white and chrome by now, which I'm still convinced would be pretty darned cool.

Posted by Ryan at April 27, 2004 11:30 AM