April 02, 2002

Oooooooooh! Ooooooooooh! "U.S. Warns Against

Oooooooooh! Ooooooooooh! "U.S. Warns Against Travel to Israel" Well, crap, there goes my summer travel plans. Dang it. Did I really require a U.S. warning for that? Let's see. . . I could handle the roaming gunfire, the omnipresent military tools, and the occassional suicide bomber, but I just couldn't get past all the Arafat squeezing. I just realized there seems to be a Mideast theme to this blog thus far. Sorry about that. Instead, let's take a gander at news of the odd. Hmmmmmm. "E.T.-mad Woman Sees the Film 773 Times" Actually, there's not much to comment on this except to say there's actually someone out there with even less of a life than myself. "Man Hit by Runaway 3-Year Old Driver" This warrants a closer look. No biggie, it turns out. The child simply put the family car in gear and it rolled backwards into a neighbor doing yardwork down the street. Still, it would make an interesting episode of cops: two officers place the handcuffed toddler in the back of a squad car, the child's face blurred out to protect his identity while the officers say things like "You just sit back there and think about what you did little man" and "No, you can't have a cookie. Are you trying to be cute?" Argh!! All these little things I keep writing about and I still don't have a column idea for this week. How long must I wait for my muse to strike? Lousy non-striking muse. Ass Like That, indeed.

Posted by Ryan at April 2, 2002 03:05 PM
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