May 20, 2002

The Force Compels Me to

The Force Compels Me to Blog
Must. . .fight. . .urge. . .to. . .blog. It's no use, I can't stop myself. This daily nonsense is as addicting as any drug. Literary crack. Must write. Must re-read what I write. Must monitor comments like a pride of lions hovering over a kill. I honestly can't explain the appeal. I couldn't jot down mind garbage like this on good old-fashioned notebook paper, but give me a cyber world in which complete strangers can peruse my prose, and I'm tapping away at the keyboard religiously. I imagine that psychology textbooks aren't even used in universities any more. No, students simply log on to the Internet, find a random blog, and determine from what psychosis the author suffers:
Monday, May 20, 2002: Visited blog of "The Countess" today. Subject seems to suffer from paranoid delusions complemented by severe manic depressive tendencies. Refers to male species as "a genetic dead end," possibly a result of her last relationship that apparently ended ugly according to her lengthy rants about "Bob the Bastard." Subject should be heavily medicated and undergo several therapy sessions.

Although I have not yet joined the masses and dragged my behind to "Episode 2: Attack of the Clones," I found that I am not immune to the allure of Star Wars. I went to Best Buy yesterday to "look around," and promptly emerged with Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II, Jedi Outcast. It's a first person shoot-em-up, that also allows the player to wield a light saber and user Force powers. What can I say? I'm a total sucker for the chance to slice and dice computer enemies with a light saber. The graphics are astounding; storm troopers actually get blown back by blaster fire, and they scream bloody murder when you push them over a precipice and they go tumbling down a chasm. Oh, those special moments. However, the state of computer games now is such that I must ponder upgrading my computer system yet again. It takes forever for a game to load. And then I die have to start over. And that takes forever too. It's bad enough that I'm wasting my life playing computer games, but now I have to waste even more time waiting to waste my life playing computer games. Hmmm, there's a lesson in there somewhere. Maybe a lesson about Heather Graham. Heather Graham. Heather Graham. Or, how about Angelina Jolie? Angelina Jolie. Angelina Jolie. Angelina Jolie.

Posted by Ryan at May 20, 2002 10:34 AM
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