March 14, 2003

A Silent Voice Shrieking From

A Silent Voice Shrieking From An Abyss

I have an audience for this blog, I'll admit it. I regard this with a certain amount of "ehh", because for every individual visiting this site for something compelling, there are about, oh, 7,000, looking for "exposed thongs." I kid you not. There is a serious exposed thong fetish sweeping the nation. I'm pretty sure Colin Powell, and of course Bill Clinton, have visited my site searching for exposed thongs.

I get more readers each week, probably, from my weekly newspaper column, which, to date, runs exactly in two rural Minnesota newspapers. As you may guess, I am considerably more open and, um, vulgar, in my blog than I am in my column. But, let me assure you, that's only because the newspapers pay me.

I'm not sure why I started blogging, except that Jen, my former officemate, talked about it like it was some sort of literary masturbation. Since I'm all about masturbation, I couldn't wait to try this blogging thing. For the record, let me just again register my disgust about Jen silencing her blog. That pisses me off to no end. She gave birth to this blog, my blog, me, this silent scream into the World Wide Web. Jen, get back online, now, lest I take your umbrella noir ass and. . . and. . . I don't know, but it will be unpleasant.

Seriously though, this blogging thing has proven to be amazing. I can't tell you how many column ideas I've just copied and pasted from this blog, just from a random brain dump that was bothering me, or amusing me, or making me itch my crotch.

I tried a personal journal once, you know, the pen and paper variety, but writing to myself was about as fulfilling as French (er, Freedom) Kissing a pillow. I mean, I know how I fucking feel. The real test of me was finding out how others gauge me. And, I found out, I don't really give a flip how people gauge me. It was an awesome epiphany to realize that, oh, there are people who disagree with me, probably to the point of jamming a knife in my left eye, preferably missing sensitive sight-related nerves so it can be repaired. blogging gives a voice to all; the war proponents, the war opponents, and those odd people who oppose violence yet attack, physically, those who do. Odd, that.

This is the blog world. May it live forever, or at least until I get recogized and can spout meaningless shit, like that Ted Rall guy. Geez, is he a dick or what?

Anyway, I'm not sure why this post came up, except that a weird commenter, of French nationality, pissed me off once, or twice, and I'm waiting on the day when I'm bigger than he or she can imagine, so I can rip on them. I figure I have about a few years. Then, watch out Frenchie.

Posted by Ryan at March 14, 2003 12:05 AM
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