May 09, 2003

I Almost Watched Sports History

I Almost Watched Sports History In The Making Last Night

The Minnesota Wild became the first hockey team in history to come back from a 3-1 playoff deficit twice during the same playoffs. It had never been done before. Never. Until last night.

And I didn't fucking see it.

I'm a hopeless fair weather fan, as I suspect most Minnesota sports fans are. I love watching Minnesota teams do well, but I can't stand watching them lose. After being disappointed by your hometown teams with such maddening repetition, you just sort of become ambivalent. Our last great hurrah was the Minnesota Twins winning the World Series way back when. Since then, we've watched the Vikings blow a 15-1 season at the hands of the Atlanta Falcons and a Gary Anderson (a.k.a. Ray Finkle) choked field goal. We've watched the Timberwolves make a token appearance in the first round of the playoffs and then quickly bow out more times than I care to remember. We had the whole Gopher men's basketball fiasco awhile back. And the Gopher football team? Well, don't get me started with them.

Our brightest sports star is in the realm of wrestling (and not that professional wrestling BULLSHIT either), but nobody seems to care about the best sport of all time, for all time. Just so you know, wrestling is the greatest sport in the world, and I'm not just saying that because I was a wrestler, and my dad was my coach.

But, anyway. I watched the Wild fall behind 2-0 against the Vancouver Canucks last night, and I gave them up for lost. I clicked off the television and fired up Medal of Honor. I figured I'd soothe my frazzled hockey nerves by laying waste to a few Nazis. As Indiana Jones said, "Nazis. I hate these guys."

For the record, Medal of Honor just so totally rocks. I mean, I like first person shooters, but this game just sets the first person shooter bar way high. It's just incredible. The graphics are so richly textured, you swear you're in a war ravaged French village. And the sound is such that you literally jump out of your skin when you hear bullets whizz past you. My only compaint is that there's not enough gore. I know, I know. . . there must be something wrong with me if I want to see blood flowing from a freshly snuffed Nazi. But, it has nothing to do with that and everything to do with realism. It's just not natural to riddle an enemy body with bullets and not even see a trickle of blood. I'm not asking for brains and intestines splattering or anything. Just a little blood. That's all.

So, I finish my Medal of Honor mission and shut the game down. I then go online to see the final damage for the Wild game. fuck-a-duck-a-ding-dong! They came back to win it 4-2! I was stunned. I was happy! I was elated! I couldn't believe I fucking missed it!

It's enough to make me want to shoot a Nazi.

Posted by Ryan at May 9, 2003 02:21 PM
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