November 11, 2003

Wrong Way, Idiot!

You know, provided nobody gets hurt, there's something deliciously funny about watching the horror on a motorist's face who is going the wrong direction on a one way street.

This morning, for example, on my way to work, I saw a female (who I wanted to have sex with) motorist signal, and then turn, onto the one way street on which I was driving. I saw it happening from a very long ways away, so I pulled over as far to the right as I could, just in case she overreacted and hit the gas and tried to make a run for it.

It was particularly funny watching the woman's car drive over the huge arrows that obviously, yet silently, state that traffic is supposed to go in one direction only, and the direction she was going was not that direction. It was at about that time that she realized her mistake, owing somewhat to the huge arrows pointing the other way, but primarily because of the 18 car horns blaring their discord at her mistake.

That's when the horror set in. As she drove by me, I could plainly make out, despite her animated hysterics, that she was saying "shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, fuck, fuck" over and over again, presumably speaking to her steering wheel. Because I didn't want to be left out of the fun, I gave the woman a tootle from my own horn and waved as she went by.

At that point, she left the road, by which I mean she pulled her vehicle over the curb and started driving in the grass. This, of course, amused me to no end.

The sight of a flustered motorist driving down the grassy median after unwittingly turning onto a one way street. Is there a better way to start the morning?

Well, sure, sex, but BESIDES that.

UPDATE: In unrelated news, I see that Plain Layne has disappeared. Again. This time, apparently, she's flustered about a Google search on her name, Layne. Permit me a little incredulity here, but if she didn't know about the results of such a search before this, she's not nearly as smart as her writing would indicate. Criminey, she appeared in MacLeans, for crying out loud. Or, maybe it was that comment left by Joshua just before her site went down? Hmmmmm. Don't mind me; just my ultra-suspicious mind at work here.

Posted by Ryan at November 11, 2003 09:36 AM
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