October 26, 2012

Mmm, Those sweet Youth-Glands


Before Ritalin, before Sudoku, there was "Youth-Gland" tablets, chock full of "Glands to Make Dull Kids Bright." Says one Dr. Bruner: "Much has been done with the transplantation of monkey and goat glands for reviving physical functions, and we expect to meet with success in putting new brains into the heads of subnormal children through the exclusive use of a sheep gland diet."

It's SCIENCE!!! You have to love the phrase "Much has been done. . . " The good doctor couldn't be a tad more specific? Well, it's comforting to know the origins of SNL's "goat boy," I guess.

Another excerpt: "Youth-Gland revives the ductless glands by feeding them and you feel this stimulation as surely as you feel revived when you are hungry and give your stomach food."

In our Millennium, we tend to refer to "giving your stomach food" as "eating."

Posted by Ryan at October 26, 2012 12:04 PM | TrackBack
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