June 04, 2012

Arbor Day

For reasons that escape me entirely, our neighbors across the street went and erected this thing:


Horrendous, right? Pointless, right? An eyesore of unequaled magnitude, right?

If there existed some sort of white picket fence around the yard, I could almost maybe consider thinking it's somewhat permissible, but as a standalone entity it's just ridiculous.

I suppose I should give the neighbors some credit for actually digging down and establishing footholds this time. When they first carted this unholy Brandenburg Gate to their yard, they merely propped it up and considered their work done, right up until a week later when strong winds mercifully toppled the epic pile of crap, and my wife and I hoped, foolishly, that they'd see the error of their ways and not attempt a second act.

Again, credit where it's due in that they also used a level this time, whereas previously this thing was a slave to the natural slant of the property, so it looked like a hopeless drunk leaning over, hoping something would take pity and run over to prop it up. Unfortunately, the neighbor just assumed leveling the thing lengthwise was sufficient, and didn't think about leveling it front to back. So, the damned thing tilts ever so slightly forward, like it's apologetically bowing to us for it's very existence--it's the architectural equivalent of our president bowing to Saudi royalty.

The residual optimist in me thinks that strong rains, combined with what I can only hope was shallow digging laziness on the part of the neighbor, will result in another arbor collapse in the coming weeks, and they'll abandon the endeavor altogether.

Then again, maybe I don't want to know what they'll do next if they decide to replace the arbor. . .

Posted by Ryan at June 4, 2012 01:20 PM | TrackBack

What wind and incompetence won't accomplish, rot will.

Honestly, an arbor can be a beautiful addition to a yard. But not if it's just plonked down like a car on blocks.


Posted by: Keith at June 5, 2012 10:47 AM

Keith, I'll have to upload a picture of the arbor with wisteria vine we built/planted over our garage in 2007. The difference is. . . stark.

Posted by: Ryan at June 5, 2012 08:57 PM

Make it so.

Posted by: Keith at June 6, 2012 11:41 AM
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