It has now been nearly three and-a-half months since this particularly bleak chapter in our lives first started. That we've made it this far is rather remarkable all by itself. I mean, holy crap.
As of last night, Zoey is now a five pound baby girl, and by all accounts she's doing just terrific. She hasn't had a significant apnea spell in a long time and, if she'd just pick up the whole breastfeeding concept, she'd be going home pretty soon. I seems, however, just as she's making progress, some doctor comes in to do an eye exam, or some nurse comes in to administer a shot, and the slight trauma of it all sets her back.
It's nice to come to the hospital and be able to simply pick Zoey up and hold her. Back during the early Kangaroo Care sessions, when she was wired like a bomb, the process of placing her on my chest required a lengthy logistical dance akin to passing a grenade from one person to another using only the butt cheeks.
I look out the hospital windows now in the early evening hours and it's still sunny, and gradually getting greener each day. I think back to those early January nights, looking out into the darkness of a winter-locked city, and the difference couldn't be more stark. I still can't believe we're here some days.
That's not to say we haven't had our share of hiccups along the way.
Speaking of which, a previous post mentioned my father-in-law had smashed my car into some wooden landscaping ties. I really didn't think, at the time, the damage could honestly be that bad. I mean, they're wooden landscaping ties, for crying out loud. How much damage could they do?
Quite a bit, it turns out.
Wooden landscaping ties can--if the driver hits them just right, at the correct angle--put a substantial dent in the passenger door, while simultaneously tearing the side panel below the passenger door completely off and destroy the side panel so entirely, its only conceivable use now would be as some sort of contemporary abstract art.
Of course, my father-in-law felt terrible, but it's not like my car was going to win any automotive beauty pageants anyway. The added damage, however, does seriously cast doubt on any chance I had of enticing an interested buyer. I'm looking at, maybe, $1,000 - $2,000 in trade-in at this point. It's low on my list of worries, to be perfectly honest.
Once Zoey is home, things will be different. Things will still be difficult and uncertain, of course, but home is where the hope is.
Posted by Ryan at April 12, 2011 05:32 PM | TrackBack5 pounds is amazing. Good for Zoey and all of you. Sorry about the car, though. Hang in there. We will keep you in our prayers, as always.
Posted by: Alex at April 12, 2011 09:24 PMCome on, Zoey. Figure out those nipple things. Mommy and Daddy and Big Brother are waiting.
Posted by: Keith at April 13, 2011 11:24 AMI stumbled across this blog. After reading your story about your daughter, having gone through a similar situation with our son (born at 2 lbs 4 oz 4.5 years ago), I'm reminded of how much we were tested by a higher power though his delivery and time in the NICU. Through his ups and downs, our inner strength and patience were pushed beyond what we ever knew we had. He showed us what a fighter he was and how determined he was to bust out of there. Sounds like your daughter is too. Through lots of prayer, support, and the kind words of friends, family, and strangers, we made it through and you will too.
Posted by: anonymous at April 21, 2011 08:55 AM