July 01, 2010

How many years in a name?

Ryan: You know, I was just thinking about the name "Matt."

Caroline: That's ... not interesting.

Ryan: You never think of an old person with the name of "Matt."

Ryan: A 90-year-old named Matt. I just can't see that.

Caroline: Or Ryan.

Ryan: Hey, I plan on dying at 50, so there.

Caroline: Shit, you'd better get livin'.

Ryan: Now, Caroline, that's an old person's name you could set your watch to.

Caroline: Old Caroliiiiiiiiiiine, good times never seemed so good

Ryan: Or so far away.

Ryan: Bradley is a good old person name, so you're safe there.

Caroline: PHEW

Ryan: Bradley is an old man, sucking thoughtfully on a corncob pipe, feeling the tingle in his right knee because it's gonna rain, sure 'nuff.

Caroline: Old man Bradley

Ryan: Marc's a goner at 52 though. Ain't no Old Man Marcs.

Caroline: He plans on dying at 56ish.

Ryan: Wait, he could always play the Marcus card, I guess. That would at least buy him into his 70s.

Caroline: It's the Marks who need to worry.

Ryan: If they try to go with Markus, God smites them on the spot on general principle.

Ryan: Matthew can get you into your 80s, I suppose.

Caroline: That's better

Ryan: There's really no way for me to get old with my name. Just "Ry" might let me limp into my 60s.

Caroline: And there's no using your middle name to help the cause.
Let's be honest.

Ryan: No. My parents pretty much doomed me with "Carroll."

Caroline: My middle name is Louise, which is a fantastic old-person name.

Ryan: Shit, you're set until you're 112.

Ryan: Carroll O'Conner made it to 76, so I could maybe go that route.

Caroline: Brittany Murphy proved that she didn't have an old-person's age.
Although Heath should be an old-person's name and that didn't pan out.

Ryan: If Brittany can't make it, then Britney is totally screwed.

Posted by Ryan at July 1, 2010 06:28 AM | TrackBack

Are you having buyer's remorse about Aidan?!?

I have observed that it is absolutely mandatory to run a unborn child's prospective full name, and the child's first and last name, through the Internet Anagram Server, to ensure that there are no unfortunate anagrams, or at least, that the anagrams at the top of the results are favorable anagrams

Posted by: Douglas Bass at July 4, 2010 10:46 PM
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