Rambling Rhodes

Repeat Performance

It's hard to believe, but it's been four years since the sensational duo of Kerri Walsh and Misty May impressed the world by winning Olympic gold by doing something with a ball.

Well, a lot has happened in four years. Kerri Walsh may still be an impossible 6'3" tall, but Misty May apparently went and got married or something, resulting in the far less awesome name "Misty May-Treanor," which saddens us here at this ThunderJournal, but the duo's repeat gold performance in China for. . . well, I guess they did something worthy of a gold medal once again. Let's see some of the hot, er, amazing action.

Here we see Walsh and May-Treanor winning the gold for best girl-on-girl hug. They won style points for tight bikini bottoms and synchronized dual arm embrace.

In this event, Walsh was awarded several points for being able to leap the height of her teammate whilst keeping her knees locked together in a most appropriate, lady-like position. A proper lady reveals nothing.

This position, referred to as the "Double Yowza," signifies oneness with the surrounding sand. Teenage boys also refer to this as "The Sticky Hand Towel."

As you can see, Walsh is a very patriotic woman and. . . HOLY CRAP SHE HAS NICE ABS!

Here, Walsh demonstrates the "Flamingo Stalk," while May-Treanor shows the "Double Hams."

In about the only image I could find of an actual volleyball (it's the blurry sphere in the background and. . . who really cares?), Walsh is shown executing "The Attacking Flamingo," while May-Treanor responds with an "Improved Ham View."

Ooh, they lost several points with this one. As you can see, Walsh maintains a near-perfect knee lock while forming "Dual Fists of Triumph," but May-Treanor let all modesty go right out the window as she combined "Dual Fists of Triumph" with a completely unnecessary "Splayed Baby Maker."

And finally, showing they're both all about maintaining international relations, Walsh and May-Treanor embrace their Chinese opponents, who couldn't resist a wandering ham grab of their own.

Once again, ladies, congratulations on winning gold in whatever it was you won gold in. And thank you, oh so very much, for wearing what you wear and looking like you do.

I need to be alone now. . . with my thoughts.

Posted by Ryan at August 21, 2008 08:20 AM | TrackBack