Rambling Rhodes

Strangers With Candy

Ryan says: C'mere.

Caroline says: Do you have candy?

Ryan says: Forget what I call it, just c'mere.

Caroline says: Is Never Gonna Give You Up the RickRoll'd song?

Ryan says: Yes it is. Y?

Caroline says: I just didn't know the name of it.

Caroline says: Honestly, the people who power walk in the halls deserve a swift punch to the asshole.

Ryan says: As do the people who brush their teeth in the bathrooms.

Caroline says: Ugh. I HATE that.

Ryan says: It's disconcerting to be taking a piss and having a stranger brush their teeth behind you.

Caroline says: Maybe your candy is too sweet.

Ryan says: Remember when a milkshake brought all the boys to the yard?

Caroline says: Fondly.

Ryan says: You fondled milkshakes?

Caroline says: I did it wrong.

Ryan says: Well, no wonder all the boys were in your yard.

Caroline says: Damn right. It was better than yours.

Ryan says: I was always lousy at milkshake fondling.

Ryan says: But, man, I could sure work the candy.

Caroline says: headline on msnbc.com: "Tenant heard loud noises from incest cellar"

Caroline says: Incest cellar?

Caroline says: Inc-ellar?

Ryan says: I'm going to put a sign on your door that says "Incest Cellar."

Caroline says: "Please knock before entering"

Ryan says: We must incest you knock first.

Caroline says: http://www.buzzfeed.com/peggy/penis-massage-pants

Ryan says: Buy them in bulk!

Caroline says: massage your nether-regions for up to 20 minutes (!!!) at a time!

Ryan says: Done and. . . done.

Caroline says: Ding! Massage is done!

Ryan says: More like "Splort! Massage is done!"

Caroline says: Splort? Really?

Ryan says: Well, what kind of onomatopoeia would you use?

Caroline says: I'm not as ... familiar with that sound as you are. I guess I'll have to take your word for it.

Ryan says: Wouldn't say I'm "familiar with it" necessarily. . .

Caroline says: LIES!

Posted by Ryan at May 2, 2008 11:36 AM | TrackBack