February 08, 2007

That Could Be a Sign of a Problem

Somebody just came to my ThunderJournal after doing a Google search on. . . "When you try to burp but you fart instead."

I'm no medical expert, but I would still like to advise this wayward soul, if I could.


I've farted while coughing before. I've even farted while sneezing before. Hell, I've farted AND crapped my pants while puking once or twice. But I've never, ever, NEVEREVER, farted while burping.

And, just so we're clear, I think it would be very humorous to both burp and fart at the same time. I think that would be a most awesome talent to possess. However, if you find yourself farting after trying to burp, that could be a symptom of something quite wrong. A burp should be mutually exclusive from any of the bodily mechanisms required for farting. For example, your anal sphincter should not in any way feel compelled to relax its grip while you burp. Likewise, a burp is a release of air from the upper torso, so it should play no role in expelling gas from the rear exhaust.

In fact, you know what? If you try to burp, but you fart instead, my guess is you're probably only minutes away from a major coronary.

Posted by Ryan at February 8, 2007 01:16 PM | TrackBack

Between this post and Lousy Cum-Guzzling Boozehounds my day has just been made a bit better. Thanks.

Posted by: Bob at February 9, 2007 07:52 AM

Then my ThunderJournal mission is complete.

Posted by: Ryan at February 9, 2007 09:19 AM

Ditto what Bob said.

Posted by: Stephen Rider at February 18, 2007 02:16 PM
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