January 06, 2005

Selling out, because I'm a sell-out like that

You are my valued readers, and as such I feel I should inform you that now, Rambling Rhodes, your daily dose of complete and utter nonsense, is officially a sell-out. You will notice two ads to the right, just above my blogroll of frequently-visited sites.

Any time someone deigns to click on those ads, this blog will get paid. Oh, it won't get paid much, probably a penny or so, maybe a nickel if I'm really lucky, but I can assure you that all proceeds will most likely go to my expanding addiction to Diet Pepsi.

The ad engine I opted for, thanks primarily due to reader comment feedback (and also because BlogAds never got back to me), is AdSense. They are good people, the people at AdSense. I know this because of no particular reason other than the fact they got back to me, and BlogAds didn't.

At any rate, because I'm now officially a sell-out, I fully endorse all sell-outs everywhere, except for those I don't endorse, and you know who you are. As such, if I see a AdSense advertisement on your site, I will dutifully click it, as I can only assume you're extending to me the same courtesy.

I may not get rich, but at least I'll remain sufficiently caffeinated.

UPDATE: And, no, I have no idea why the ads right now feature cow-related content, but yes, I do think it's very funny.

ANOTHER UPDATE: Can you get any more niche than a Web site called simplybovine.com?

UPDATE AGAIN: CATTLE SLAUGHTERLINES?!! This whole AdSense thing is providing more laughs than I could have possibly imagined.

ANOTHER IMPORTANT UPDATE: As of 11:30 a.m., I've managed to earn $1.28 in AdSense click-through revenue, which is .18 cents more than I need for a 20 oz. quencher of Diet Pepsi from IBM vending machines. As far as I'm concerned, AdSense has now paid for itself, which shouldn't be all that hard to do, seeing as how it's free.

Posted by Ryan at January 6, 2005 09:53 AM

The ads are cow-related because you say "cow" about 72 times in your post below.

Posted by: David Grenier at January 6, 2005 10:04 AM

Oh, yeah, David. I forgot about that post, short term memory that I have. Although I think your "72 mention" estimate may be a tad high.

I wonder, if I write "David Grenier blows donkies" about 130 times in a row, what kind of ads should I expect?

Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 10:17 AM

I can put up with your right-wing sensibilities, and I can (just) barely tolerate your insensitivity and I can also sigh and roll my eyes at your refusal to apologise for the above, but . . . . diet pepsi? Ick. That's just TOOOOO much. Cop-out. I wonder how long it'll be before the ads are all about kittens.

Posted by: Simon at January 6, 2005 10:56 AM

Yeah, diet pepsi tastes like a diluted version of diet coke missed with 2 year old vinegar and a 90 year old woman's bowel movement. Yuck dude.

Posted by: Rick at January 6, 2005 11:26 AM

That just goes to show how dedicated the folks at Diet Pepsi truly are. I mean, think of the amount of scientific research and trial and error required to achieve the taste of a "diluted version of diet coke missed with 2 year old vinegar and a 90 year old woman's bowel movement?" Nailing down the taste of a 90 year old woman's bowel movement, alone, must have taken years, and countless 90 year old women. To drink Diet Pepsi is to taste the labor of flavor geniuses, and I proudly tip my 20 oz. quencher to them.

Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 11:35 AM

Yay! Ryan for Prez! He'll give FREE Diet Pepsi to everyone on welfare instead of having to learn English. You bastard, you made me laugh. But check out Violet Blue's take on all this . . .
Scary shit, huh? For those of you shy to check the link, here's a quote:
"Did you know that there's no word for 'maintenance' in the Mexican language?"
Ryan, it's ammo for ya. Happy shootin'!

Posted by: Simon at January 6, 2005 11:49 AM

I'd consider sticking my wang in Violet Blue:


Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 11:59 AM

Hey Ryan, if I bring my GoogleAdsense back will you click through on mine and I'll click through on yours and we can both get rich?

I'm wondering what kind of ads you'd get if you posted another dirty mushroom pic.

Posted by: Johnny Huh? at January 6, 2005 12:26 PM

Yeah, d'uh! That's the one she's talking about! Consider for a microsecond before remembering you're human. Ryan, did you ever have a cranial circumcision? If not, I'm sure there's an insurance payout due soon . . .

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Posted by: Simon at January 6, 2005 12:38 PM

I realize that the Violet Blue pornstar is the one the Violet Blue blogger was talking about. I was curious what the Violet Blue pornstar looked like after reading the Violet Blue blog. And then, I ascertained that the Violet Blue pornstar may, in fact, be wang worthy.

Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 12:42 PM

Appearances, eh? The visual nature of the male libido. Forget not that the porno Violet is at best a bubblehead and at worst a racist (but she looks cute), and avoid dicking the original Violet who not only educates but promotes (and [s]experiences) . . . ahh, d'you know what? I'm gonna have to go outside and pick cigarette butts out of the flower pot if I wann a smoke again tonight. Good job I still have some papers left (from over a year ago, I hasten to add).

Posted by: Simon at January 6, 2005 01:03 PM

there's got to be a clause somewhere in the legal terms that cites multiple hits from a single IP. Otherwise, the Mint wants in on the action.

Posted by: seed at January 6, 2005 01:07 PM

Nevermind, found it:
Prohibited/Fraudulent Clicks
Any method that artificially and/or fraudulently generates clicks is strictly prohibited. These prohibited methods include but are not limited to: repeated manual clicks, incentives to click, using robots, automated clicking tools, or other deceptive software. Please note that clicking on your own ads for any reason is prohibited, to avoid potential inflation of advertiser costs.

Posted by: seed at January 6, 2005 01:12 PM

Seed, yes, there are limitations, probably to the tune of allowing one IP click a day to be counted. But, if you have 30 or so people agreeing to click your ad banner once a day, that's about $7.68 a day, or about $230 a month. Again, it won't make you rich, but it could pay your gas bill.

Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 01:13 PM

Just remember, you're not really getting money from Google. You're getting money from the person running the site you click to, Google is just taking a huge commission on it.

I know, because I am one of those people.

So you're not really scamming Google (which has piles of money), you're scamming anything from eBay (which also has piles of money) to the person trying to start a business selling custom-made saltshakers (who doesn't have piles of money).

So try to keep that in mind when you're clicking on stuff for your "free" pepsi. In other words, click on the eBay ad.

Posted by: David Grenier at January 6, 2005 02:26 PM

Just as an FYI, some of our search terms we pay close to $2 a click (i.e. "Boston Wedding Photographer").

That's the click Ryan is getting his quarter for. So his $230 a month that he's getting is giving Google $920 a month. And that $1150 to pay for all of it is coming right out of my pocket.

I mean, assuming that it were my ads on there yinz are clicking on.

So again, click on the eBay ads, they can afford to spend thousands a month in advertising. Don't click on the ad for some no-name website you don't even intend to look at or buy stuff from.

Posted by: David Grenier at January 6, 2005 02:32 PM

It's a good point that the big boys should be clicked if you have no intention of buying anything and just want to click to click. However, the $230 a month I listed up there is basically wishful thinking, because most people, even friends and family, will rarely take the time to click on those ads, and that propensity to click will only diminish over time. I'll be quite surprised to see even $20 a month, if that. So, I think you're thousands of dollars are pretty safe, David, at least when it comes to the ads on my blog. But I see your point.

Posted by: Ryan at January 6, 2005 03:28 PM

I am nothing if not a follower so I took your lead here and put up Blogads at . Snooze Button Dreams will remain unsponsored for the nonce as my Lovely Wife has threatened to cut me off if I go total money-grubber on her. Feh.

I recommend adding the Ad bar to your individual index pages too. The ads that come up on these are a whole lot more intelligent than the ones that appear on the front page. At least that's what I've found on ZeroIntelligence. It creates teh possibility that you might actually provide a link that somebody will want to click on. ;)

Posted by: Jim at January 18, 2005 07:37 AM

I seen your comment above. Why don't we do that?? Why don't we get 500 people together that have websites with adsense and click on each others ads once a day?? People helping people.....that'd be nice.


Posted by: Missy G at April 12, 2005 10:13 PM
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