May 30, 2002

Those Crazy Brazillians Two items

Those Crazy Brazillians
Two items in news of the odd today about those wacky Brazillians.

"Fear of Fat Keeps Women Hooked on Smoking" That's right, Brazillian women, determined to maintain the perfect body, are madly puffing themselves thin, according to a Sao Paulo Heart Hospital study. Tobacco companies must be drooling at the marketing gold being dangled in front of them.
"Are you overweight? Try smoking."
Said one 23-year-old Brazillian model Tais Thormann, "I know smoking is bad, but I don't want to stop because it makes me lose weight. When I am hungry, I go for a cigarette and a little coffee."
Ah, yes, cigarettes and coffee, the world's most preferred health diet. No one said beautiful people were also necessarily smart. Except for me of course.

"Cheating Husbands Profit From Rampant Crime" You know your country has a kidnapping problem when husbands use it as an alibi after a night of infidelity. According to the story, "Police in Brasilia said on Wednesday they busted two men for false alibis and a third is under investigation after they pinned jaunts with other women on thugs and thieves." Imagine the following scene if you will:
SCENE: Husband comes home, dramatically falling through the door in feigned exhaustion. His clothes are messed up, as is his hair.
WIFE: And just where have you been all night?
HUSBAND: Oh, it was horrible! I was kidnapped! I barely escaped with my life!
WIFE: Is that lipstick on your collar?
HUSBAND: Did I mention they were very affectionate kidnappers?
WIFE: I don't believe you! Why do you find me unattractive? Is it because I've put on weight?
HUSBAND: Yes, but maybe you could take up smoking.

Posted by Ryan at May 30, 2002 03:48 PM
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